The Good Shepard

I always know a good movie by its ability to make me to talk about it afterwards; trying to figure out every little plot twist, foreshadowing, and line of dialogue that occurred. If you want to see the antithesis of The Good Shepard, go see James Bond: Casino Royale. The Good Shepard follows Matt Damon through his life, basically telling the tale of a Skull and Bones Society Yalee who becomes the backbone of WWII - 1960's C.I.A. I really enjoyed the first third and the last third of the movie. The story is not funny, not action packed (yet it is suspenseful), and probably not what you are expecting. And, Angelina Jolie plays a much more minor role than the previews depict. This is what I see as to a more "real life" depiction of CIA work: dissecting one photograph and one reel of sound into every last pixel and granule; not seducing blondes in bikinis while fighting bad guys with a third nipple. In sum, Matt Damon learns that he really can't trust anyone (not at all shocking considering he works with foreign counter intelligence agents---hello). If you are looking for a glamorous, sexy, romanticized spy movie, stick with Bond. If you are looking for something with more grit, depth, and more realistic, by all means, go see The Good Shepard.

The Office - Christmas Outpost

Instead of my regular posting locale, Starbucks on 24th and 6th, I am setting up shop in Mesquite TX for the next few days. I'll be frequenting the Panera Bread across from Town East Mall. I am so suburban.

James Brown - One Bad Mutha F@#$a

This will be my little tribute to James Brown. I saw him perform at the Diesel party during Fashion Week this past fall, and I have to say that he can put on a show....a cheesy cruise ship style show, but a show none the less. RIP brotha, and thanks for the memories.

This article has to be about his wife/backup dancer in the video. Haha. Click it.

My Poor Dallas Gays

Now, I pride myself in surrounding myself with super hot gays in each of my cities: NYC and Dallas. So, I had to check out the scene while in Texas. Let me tell you I was shocked to see the specimens my lovely friends have to pick from. Seriously, I pity them. This was what I saw on a Friday night at JRs. Power Gays in Dallas.....where are you??

Barneys at Northpark...Wake Up Dallasites

I took a little journey to Northpark Mall yesterday, and was excited to check out the brand new Barneys (ah yes, a little bit of NYC in the heart of the Metroplex). I was absolutely shocked to find that there were about 5 customers (including me and my mother) in the entire store. Now I know that it seems like luxuriously witty Barneys from NYC has come to rain on your stodgy Neiman Marcus parade, but give me a break. The Winter Sale is in full force, and what was a deluge of everyone and their mother in Manhattan was nothing more than a trickle in Dallas. New plan: forget fighting the crowds in NYC, I'll just save my sanity and come to Dallas. This is a goldmine!

Fashion Disaster Fridays Vol 3

This is not a joke. I took this picture outside of Starbucks at 26th and 6th last Sunday. She actually came inside the store then walked out...just in time for me to get an awesome shot. Heinous.

Leave Marisha Pessl Alone!

Eh, my poor friend Marisha Pessl, author of Calamity Physics....it just never ends for this gal. Seems to me that you can either be an ugly troll of a writer and get loads of accolades, or you can be gorgeous and everyone dogs your book because they attribute the publicity to the looks and not the novel. NY Magazine's Curve of Expectations puts her in the "Overhyped-Backlash" phase. Seriously. Leave her alone!

Click on the chart to get a better view.

Back in TX

Ok, so I have gone back to the land of big hair, too much make up, fake boobs, and acrylic nails.....no I am not on Long Island; I am back in Texas for the Holidays. I will give you a little taste of the Lone Star State though: last night while I was at Macaroni Grill with my parents a woman came in with a Christmas light necklace complete with batter pack that created a medallion of flashing lights around her neck. Seriously, it only gets better from here. Fashion Disaster Fridays have gone to a whole new level. Get ready to rumble tomorrow.

Thanks x 1000

To everyone who has checked out the site, thank you so much!! I hit 1000 impressions over the weekend since I started the blog. That may not sound incredibly high, but I think it's pretty damn cool. Thanks again!

PS- Crap, leave some comments. I would love to hear what you think!

Mommy---Where Do Christmas Trees Come From?

If you live in NYC, the answer to that question is Duane Reade. Haha. Most people I know get their trees delivered, set up (not decorated though...that is the fun part), and taken away after the holidays. I love how New Yorkers seem to outsource just about everything. Somehow the trees just don't look as festive on the sidewalk as they do from a Christmas tree farm. They still smell just as wonderful though. Christmas is coming!

HOT GOSSIP - Scarlett Johansson

Only in New York kids.....My roommate's best guy friend has been having a sexy, steamy time with Scarlett Johansson. Hot Liam! Turns out he was a cater-waiter at a Chanel party and met her there. I pity the girl who has to follow her up. Those are some big --er shoes to fill. I know Isaac Mizrahi is jealous.

Swift Bar

I stumbled upon Swift at a friend's work holiday party, and this place is definitely a diamond in the rough. It is easy to overlook, but is so great when you are there. It is a no-nonsense, minimal pretense, laid back place. AND it is so great right now because it is decorated for Christmas. I love it. It has a tavern-esque feel which makes it low key and not too rowdy. There are plenty of places to sit and grab a beer and there were quite a few hotties there on Saturday afternoon. I will definitely be back.

Swift - E. 4th btwn Lafayette and Bowery

Fashion Disaster Fridays: Vol 2

Jordan says, "Honey, silver leggings, a fanny pack, and a sequined headband are not half as distinguished as my Star of David ascot."

Release Your Inner Socialite

Yes, we know you may shop at Target, get all done up in your duds from the Gap, and live in burbs, but NOW is the time to release your inner socialite. We all have it in us. Entitlement, endless amounts of money, and of course, no day job except to be utterly fabulous. This article on Style.com is a wonderful photo montage of socialites of the past and present. You will notice that Paris, Nicole, and insert-celebutant-of-the-moment-here are entirely absent. They would never hold a candle to the previous regime. Check it out. Very interesting.

Socialites Then and Now - style.com

My least favorite neighborhood

I cannot tell you enough how much I hate going out on the Lower East Side. Not only are all the places grungy dive bars with dudes who need some serious personal grooming advice, but they card absolutely everywhere. I have definitely not found this to be the case in NYC, especially in Chelsea (besides the Cuda) and Meatpacking. Bungalow, Double 7s, Marquee, Hiro, you name it; I am never carded anywhere in the city (and neither is anyone else unless you look 14). Then I go down there and am carded at EVERY place I go. Seriously, it's very sweet of them, but in no way do I look like I am under 21. I may sound like a super diva, but I don't really care.

Marc Jacobs + Jason = Round 1MM

You know I can't resist my fav nerdy fashion designer/rent boy couple. Here is the "update" courtesy of NY Daily News. Thanks for the old news!! I knew about this months ago!

Report of split not so far off the Marc

Looks like designer Marc Jacobs wants nothing to do with his one-time boyfriend, hardbodied former rent boy Jason Preston.

We reported last month that the pair had split, which earned us this electronic tongue-lashing from Preston: "We're still happily together. DAMN, get your facts straight & stop hating." And true, the couple looked cuddly at a Nov. 14 party.

But now it seems the twentysomething Twinkie might have to change his "Marc Jacobs" forearm tattoo to "Markdown."

We ran into Jacobs yesterday at the premiere of Michael Lucas' flashy high-budget skin flick "La Dolce Vita." Asked how Preston was doing, Jacobs told us, "I couldn't tell you. I haven't seen him. I haven't spoken to him. I don't know what he's doing. And if he told me, I'm not sure I would believe him, because he's not a very honest person."

Ouch. Preston didn't respond to our E-mails yesterday, but we did suspect the worst when, a mere two weeks after Preston defended his relationship with Jacobs, our own Ben Widdicombe reported the ex-hustler making out with gossip blogger Perez Hilton.

When did things go sour? A source tells us it may have been a night the couple spent with friends at the gay lounge Therapy, when Jacobs was introduced to a handsome young fellow, who will remain nameless for now.

The designer gave the 23-year-old a warm greeting on Tuesday, and we hear he was to be a guest at Jacobs' holiday masquerade party last night.

Awards Season is HERE

My favorite time of the year has kicked off! Golden Globe nominations were released today. I love awards season like a Kate Moss loves a good fat bump. The red carpet, the fashion police, Isaac Mizrahi feeling Scarlett Johansen's boobies.....what's not to love! If you don't know what the Hollywood Foreign Press it is, I will explain in a rant later as to what a huge joke they are. Regardless, let the cat fight begin! I'm excited already!

And here are the Golden Globe Nominees....

Socialite Rank - Love it!

THE talk of NYC over the past few weeks has been a blog called Socialite Rank. If you live outside of NYC you have probably never heard of these people, but they are THE New York elite: this is way beyond Paris and Nicole. These social doyennes base their lives around galas, gowns, and glasses of champers. It is all about being photographed (with the right people at the right events), flashing your socialite brass, and never being seen in the same thing twice. The huge scandal is who writes it (no one knows), who reads it, and who has clawed their way to the stop of the NYC society ladder. Check it out... Tinsley Mortimer will thank you.

Socialite Rank

Draq Queen Cop Gives Tickets

Call me crazy, but I think he could do his job and be equally effective even if he weren't dressed as a raging tranny. It's a slippery slope my friend...one day you are wearing dresses and fishnets as a joke, the next day you using words like gorgeous, fabulous, and girlfriend (when referring to both men and women).

Officer Delicious, aka West Palm Beach police officer Terry Golden, stands at Okeechobee Boulevard and Jog Road on Wednesday morning as he watches for cars running red lights and alerts nearby fellow officers. "I've seen people drive by eating food and when they see me, the food just falls out of their mouth" Golden said of his outfit. Another officer was dressed as a homeless person. Officers gave 77 drivers tickets in about 90 minutes.

Ugly Christmas Sweater Party

I know it's mid-December, and I am sure your weekends are booked from here through New Years, but if you have a spare Friday or Saturday you must host an Ugly Christmas Sweater Party. I had one last weekend, and it was a complete riot. Who doesn't love to see their most fashionable friends look like complete fools. It is tricky though to find a sweater that is 1)heinous, 2)cheap, 3)no one else will have. The Goodwill is ok if you are not disturbed by the fact you are wearing someone else's sweater (who obviously had the bad taste to wear it, but ultimately came to their senses and gave it away). TJMaxx had some truly horrid specimens, but they were over $60. Burlington Coat Factory was the best bet. $13 for an embroidered sweater vest. It is shocking that people actually wear this stuff. The best part was when one woman complimented me on what a gorgeous sweater I had, and if I could point her in the direction where I got it. OMG I almost died. The laughs never end with this one. Each one is worse than the last!

Cafeteria

This is one of my favorite late night eateries in Chelsea, so it is a wonder I have not written about it before. I guess last night was one of the few occasions where I went there a)on a week night, and b) not at 4am after a night of hard core boozing. This is a great place that's open 24 hrs, which is surprisingly hard to come by in the "city that doesn't sleep". It is completely wild say, Saturday around 3am, but it was surprisingly crowded Tuesday night at 11ish. This is definitely a gay scene and even though all the furnishings are pretty Ikea-style, it is sleek and stylish in its own way. Basically, it looks trendy from the outside, but is really a upscale incarnation of a late night diner. I'm not going to lie, I have had the chicken fried steak and it was delicious (I don't know if that was the booze talking though), and the mac and cheese is perfect after drinking. On more sane nights I opt for the spinach salad which I love. You really can't go wrong here. Nothing is terribly expensive, unless you order an entire side of the menu which my friends have done before. If you are in a rush I might pass it up though, because the service can be quite slow. Regardless, its easy and delish: you can't go wrong with that.

Cafeteria - 7th Ave btwn 16th and 17th

Bare Naked!

I'm definitely not a tree-hugger granola type girl, but on a cold winter's morning I love oatmeal. Not the runny kind that reminds me of three bears and porridge or looks like oatmeal puree, but the thick meaty kind with chunks and fruit bits, etc. After years of eating Quaker Oats Cinnamon Roll oatmeal (which is right on par with crack in it's addictiveness), which is loaded with high fructose corn syrup (honey, no) I made the switch to Kashi oatmeal. Truthfully, eating that was like a kid forcing down medicine. It tasted like cardboard and had the nastiest gelatinous texture. YUCK! As a last resort I tried Bare Naked Oatmeal (I got mine at Whole Foods), and I absolutely love it. There are actual dried blueberries in the fruit flavored one, and it is absolutely delicious with just the right mix of mushiness and texture. Seriously, give it a whirl. Your body will thank you.

Bare Naked Granola

This is why 12 year olds can't drink

Our good friend Coco Richie followed in the footsteps of her partner in crime, Paris, and got arrested for a DUI two nights ago (driving on the wrong side of the freeway none the less). The police report said she was 5'1" and weighed 85 pounds. My trusty little Blood Alcohol Content calculator only goes down to 100 lbs. Damn. When cross referenced with my BMI calculator I see that Nicole's BMI (body mass index) is only 16.1. Anything under 18.5 is considered underweight. It looks like modeling in Spain is out for Nicole, as well as driving in LA. No more drinking your dinner!

BMI Index Calculator
Blood Alcohol Calculator

Macys: A Stampede Waiting to Happen

We have all heard new stories from far off lands about people getting trampled to death. I distinctly remember a story about thousands of people on a pilgrimage crossing a bridge. A rumor of a bomb threat spread through the masses and hundreds of people were trampled to death by a human stampede. I confronted a similar situation this past weekend at Macy's Herald Square (or what I like to call the epicenter of American consumerism at its worst). It was almost scary being in there. You had to wait in a line to use the escalator, you could barely walk at a snail's pace, and all over were tourists clutching their belongings as if they were going to become the next victim of an NYC mugging. The ingredients were all there: excitement, jumpiness, and so many people it looked like one of those Discovery channel videos where ants from the Amazon overtake anything that comes in their path. One wrong move or fire alarm and we all would have been crushed.

Fredrick Ford - Worst Music Video of ALL TIME

This could quite possibly be the worst music video all the time. This is a must see. Someone needs to tell this guy that just because you have a camcorder, a foil lined spinning box, and an awful song doesn't mean you should make a music video. Utterly heinous.

Drag Queen Bingo

Didn't gay it up enough on Saturday night? Check out Sunday afternoons at Splash: Drag Queen Bingo and $1 beers. Seriously, can you think of a better way to spend the Lord's Day?

Maroons

Tired of the same old brunch? The wait at Pastis...boring eggs bennie...mimosas where you feel like you are drinking regular OJ. Mix it up and head to Maroons. They have a Jamaican and southern inspired menu and live jazz during brunch. We all got the fried chicken with waffles or homefries, and it was great: not KFC greasy, but moist and juicy. Brunch is a prix fixe $15 which includes a brunchy cocktail. Skip the Maroons Madness (way too sugary) and go straight for the screwdriver. Talk about hair of the dog. Yikes. Our waiter was hilariously sassy so that livened things up a bit. Definitely a great deviation from the norm, really fun, and where else can you eat fried chicken without feeling totally ghetto.

Maroons - 16th btwn 7th and 8th

Fashion Disaster Friday vol 1

Ok, I think we all know that plaids and argyle don't mix...unless you have grandchildren or are wearing knickers on a golf course....and even then it is questionable. I am sure his mom got him this smashing combo as an early Christmas present. Hello--change after you get through security. Momma will be happy, and so will they person next to you on the plane who would have had to look at that outfit for 4 hours.

Place: LGA Date: Nov 27

$500 Fine?!

I love finding humorous stuff as I walk along the streets of Manhattan. If you can't read the sign above the pipe it says, "Please do not sit on it. Must fine $500." What are these people thinking? First of all, who the hell is going to police this? If you were sitting (on a pipe I guess) and someone came out and said you owed them $500 for doing so you would tell them to fuck off then go on your merry way. I don't think they can legally demand money from you, and who the hell are they to collect on it. Secondly, wouldn't this just promote MORE sitting on the pipe? Everyone loves to test the limits, so if anything I would say that the $500 'fine' would only encourage people to do it. Come on Mr. Chinese-Import-Shop-Manager on 6th ave and 31st Street. If he really wanted no one to sit on the pipe he should say a homeless guy peed on it the day before.

Nello's - Pink Dog Stroller Not Amusing

I pulled this one from the archives...please heed as a warning and laugh at the utter pompousness.

I expected high prices at Nello, but as I looked at the menu my eyes became as large as the Birkin Mary-Kate has been seen toting around these days--$18 for soup, $22 for a plate of mixed greens, $40 for pasta. You have to be kidding me. My friend and I were seated at a table that may have well been in the 'waiting area', and the genius maitre d' decided to keep the front door open even though it was 40 degrees outside. To top it all off, a woman came into the restaurant pushing a pink stroller--carrying two dogs none the less, which the staff promptly made room for at her table. Give me a break! I can get a hell of a lot of soup and salad at Whole Foods for $40. I could almost hear the cash register in the staff's heads going Ca-Ching! Ca-Ching! Ca-Ching!

Nello's - Madison btwn 62nd and 63rd.

Tortilla Flats

Beware: 2 pitchers of margs on the rocks will run you about $90. Even though potency receives and A+ in my book (being from TX I am quite the connoisseur), that is quite a bill for beverages served in pitcher form. They also have trivia night on Sundays which is like Trivial Pursuit frat house style with winners getting free tequila shots. My advice: steer clear of the farthest table in the back of patio. There is a dryer vent spewing hot humid air which engulfs your legs. My advice: fashion a menu to funnel the air away and bring out the plastic because these margs will either polish you off or be the beginning of a CRAZY night.

Tortilla Flats - Washington @ 12th Street

You can take the guy out of the trailer park.....

K-Fed done himself up all good. Courtesy of Page Six.

December 7, 2006 -- BRITNEY Spears' ex, Kevin Federline, is finally starting to realize people think he's a sleazebag - and is desperately trying to change his image. Not only did he send out a press release yesterday stating that he had replaced his trademark chains and wife-beater tank top for a suit jacket and button-down shirt (although the pants remain at half mast), he's also trying to learn how to sound smart. Federline and his posse randomly showed up at the Village Vanguard last week to catch the book launch of David Matalon and Chris Woolsey's tome, "The Concise Guide to Sounding Smart at Parties." Witnesses say that Fed-ex "actually chatted up the authors and seemed interested in how to sound smart." But eventually, his true nature took over: "He and his buddies went to the bar and pounded Everglo liquor shots for the rest of the night. They were really there for the free booze. Pathetic."

Dirty Little Romp at Barneys

You will never look at the cologne guy at Barneys again without thinking of this story!

DO NOT CLICK HERE if you are easily offended.

My Fav Winter Accessory (besides self tanner)

Inspired by grandpas and golfers, my new winter 'must-have' is the golf cap. Sexier than the beanie, wamer than nothing, bad hair day--taken care of, and more polished than the skullcap/bill combo. You wild ones may go for the crazy plaid, but I have taken to black cashmere myself (I got mine at Barneys as a little Christmas present to myself). They will run you a few dollars, but think about how long gramps has been wearing his. AND cheap hats mean itchy foreheads. Definitley an good investment.

I Miss Summer

Could we all take a minute to bring ourselves out of the cold wind, sun going down at 4:30 and covering every square inch of skin. Just remember the warm days of summer: basking in the sun, little dresses, coifed beachy hair, and having a tan!

Let Paris take you there.....close your eyes and imagine the warmth....

Those Crazy Danes

Here is a little taste of what our friends across the pond are checking out on TV courtesy of cnn.com. I am all for freedom of speach and everything, but Jesus.

Another show raising eyebrows is "Spuiten en Slikken" (Shooting and Swallowing), on which every sexual persuasion can be found. It broadcasts on the youth-oriented public broadcater BNN, currently the most risque station in Holland.

The program, which claims to have an educational purpose, caused a scandal even before its first episode. One of the presenters experiments onscreen with all kinds of soft and hard drugs. The program also features the exploration of sexual activities, including S&M, swingers clubs, squirting female orgasms and prostate milking (shown in full detail), leading to a flurry of political disapproval.

The Dutch have had their fair share of tasteless television in recent years. Considered by some as the nadir of gutter TV, "Patty's Fort," which aired in 2004 on RTL, saw minor Dutch celebs led by former pop singer Patty Brard gather for a colonic irrigation session in a health spa, with the scatological results shown to the audience.

The country has a long history of pushing the televisual envelope. In 1967, broadcaster VPRO caused a worldwide sensation by showing a nude model for the first time on national TV, shown reading a Christian newspaper. The resulting furor led to the cancellation of the avant-garde program, called "Hoepla," after only three episodes.

Death would be thought by some to be the ultimate taboo, but the Dutch were among the first to screen it. Twelve years ago, the religious broadcaster Ikon presented a documentary called "Death by Request," in which a euthanasia case was shown until the very end, making worldwide headlines.

El Rio Grande - The Restaurant, Not the River

El Rio Grande is my favorite tex-mex restaurant in NYC. Hands down. It is the only place I have found where I can get my favorite Texas Queso. This is not it's wimpy sister the Queso Fundito which is melted cheese in a skillet, but a bowl of melted cheese, japs, and onions perfect for dipping chips or tortillas. The tacos and enchiladas are great and my new favorite winter dish is the chicken soup with avacado and tomatoes. And, of course it has the requisite boozy margarita. Delish. I feel like I am back in Austin.

El Rio Grande (38th and 3rd Ave)

Barney's Winter Sale

Bonjour....to anyone living in a cave (or off the island for that matter) the Barney's Winter Sale started this weekend. Get Thee to Barney's immediately! I am obsessed with their "Happy Andy War-holiday's" theme. Loves it!

The Black Door

After the monsoon on Friday evening, I figured it could possibly be disastrous to venture too far away from my apartment. It was not worth getting caught in that again. I had heard of The Black Door, a little no frills neighborhood bar, from my roommate and decided to check it out. It was a great little low-key place with cheap (by NYC standards) drinks. My fav, Grey Goose on the rocks with lem and lime was $8. It would have easily been $13 at the Gansevoort. I also loved the music....it really took me back to my middle school days with mid-nineties tween anthems from Bush, Weezer, and Stone Temple Pilots. And, now I know where the straight Chelsea kids come to grab a drink. Definitley recommended for a low-key night when you aren't looking to drop a lot of coin, and are more interested in grabbing a drink then dealing with the scene.

The Black Door (26th btwn 6th and 7th Ave)

The Spotted Pig

Ok, so this is my #2 'go-to' restaurant. Fabulous, laid back, delicious food. They do have some adventurous menu items like a crispy pig's ear and something involving eel, but 90% of the people get the burger, and for good reason. The hamburger is the best I have had, and I think I gained 15 pounds after I ate it. It was total food coma style. The mozzarella salad is great and on the lighter side, and I also loved the quail. This is a great place to have dinner or hang out at the bar upstairs or down. They are serving mulled wine right now. If you haven't have it get yourself there ASAP...it is the perfect winter beverage. I was there last night, and I would say it was pretty wild for a Thursday but started to quiet down around 10:30. Very much like a neighborhood pub, you sit on bar stools (even at a table unless you get a coveted booth) and it is packed. I have had to wait 30-45 minutes every time to get a table...even on Sundays. Regardless, this is one of my favorite places.

The Spotted Pig - (11th @ Greenwich Street)